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2001-09-18 - 9:28 a.m.

I tried really hard to quit my job yesterday but then I chickened out. So, to stick it to the man I worked harder than normal to ease the guilt. I should really take another look at my values. I am tired of having the frustrations of a sales team in a depressed market using me as a representative of a system for a scapegoat. It's not me, it's the software they don't like. But I represent it, and I can be yelled at, and made to feel bad and suffer and such. This is a service I have offered my company since I was hired. Lucky me.

Although things perked up in the afternoon when I met the Asia Project Manager's husband, who was visiting over the weekend. He was shorter than I expected, and one of those brash, mountain dew swilling braggarts with skull tattoos and a chip on his shoulder. I'm glad that I didn't like him, because I would have felt guilty about considering breaking up his marriage. I imagine his downward spiral into depression and alchoholism, all set to Macy Grey's I Try, until on a brisk San Francisco afternoon when Bridget and I come across him begging in North Beach for change. I'll drop a few quarters on his blanket, next to the Gulf War Vet cardboard sign, and Bridget will cry as the wind picks up and the fog rolls in. Of course, he'd probably bounce back to some trailer and live with a stripper with low self esteem and life will go on, but I prefer my version.

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Zen and don't cry out loud - 2007-07-29

Zen and the stumbling rocks of fitness - 2007-07-19

- - 2007-07-11

Zen and fasting - 2007-06-20

Zen and hiccups - 2007-06-18

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