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2002-10-09 - 11:28 p.m.

I have a freezer full of ants. Which is just a strange sentence. I was in the kitchen this evening when I noticed the familiar conga line going up the side of my fridge. Opening the freezer door, where the line was disappearing I noticed the piles of tiny frozen insects. I have no explanation for the migration to the frozen wasteland that is my freezer. Itís not like the frost glaciers inside swept down and trapped the hapless workers like some insect equivalent of the Donner Party. Iím just going to let them march to their doom, or until the freezer reaches maximum capacity. There is not a lot that I can do about it tonight. Stupid, tenacious ants.


From Weetabix(via email):
    So I was thinking about the ants, about how one ant had to have made it back to tell the other ants about the veritable treasure trove of shitty pizza in the freezer. And then I thought, "What if that ant was just FAKING it?" Because seriously, that could have been an act of ant terrorism. Perhaps Osanta Bug Laden wanted to off a couple hundred of the colony, perhaps he wanted a better shot at wooing the queen.

    But then, I seem to remember that worker ants are sexless, so maybe he's just an ant serial killer. Hantibel Lector. He faked them all out with stories about delicious pepperoni. The Japanese beetle told him to do it. Maybe he was just sick of work work work and wanted to do a little grasshoppering for a bit. Maybe he just had crazy ant logic and there really is no answer and instead, we'll always wonder. But then I remembered that they follow a chemical trail, so the first ant is probably frozen as well and the rest were just stupid.

Have something to say about the ants? Send me an email.

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