Your cocktail sir,





2007-06-20 - 11:00 a.m.

I have been fasting since Sunday evening, which sounds all noble and the like, but really, it's not.

I don't handle the fast very well, I become irritable and cranky and snap at people and act all passive aggressive.

Last night, going on hour 48 of just iced tea, multivitamins, and water, I was ready to just beat the crap out of someone. I'd come from my personal training apointment and was just, angry. So I slept it off. And then cleaned the kitchen. Which I think was taken as a passive aggressive tact, but really was not. I had an outlet suddenly, something that I could tackle and make better in a short amount of time, a goal that I could finish with results that allowed me to feel like I've accomplished something.

And so this morning I had a yogurt. And then some coffee cake from Starbucks at break. I don't feel "clearer" or "more in touch" or even like I've fasted. I was proud of myself for breaking my emotional food cycle for a couple of days, even though it didn't really do much. I don't know. There was no meditation with this fasting, it was a little bit imposed by outside influences and my own stubborness.

I kind of want to climb up a mountain with some broth packets and just think for a while. Except I'd probably get bored. And then wander down to look for a mall.

previous - next

Zen and don't cry out loud - 2007-07-29

Zen and the stumbling rocks of fitness - 2007-07-19

- - 2007-07-11

Zen and fasting - 2007-06-20

Zen and hiccups - 2007-06-18

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